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1.07.2005
The other night I had a little celebration... a little dinner party... I dunno if it were a dinner party... at what point do you call it a party... there were four of us... I guess it was a party... we had a keg... but I do that when I'm with myself anyway... so I invited a friend over and she said "Well I should warn you, I'm allergic to cats." and I said, "Well I'm not serving cat.... but I hope yah like poodle." So she came over and I solved the problem because I made her eat outside on the porch with my other friend who is allergic to my couch. They had a really great time because as it turns out, they're both allergic to peanuts and any kind of fun. This is my point... if you're gonna be a host... be a responsible host and find out what they are allergic to before they come over. She was allergic to cats and he was allergic to the down feathers in the couch. People are allergic to a lot of things. Penicillin. So if you're serving that, a LOT of people are allergic to that. There are some people who are totally allergic to everything. Have you ever met anybody like that? And then they get really pissed off if you never invite them over. I'm sorry, but their plastic bubbles will not fit through my front door. Some people are allergic to histimines... which wine... that's all it is is histimines. It's just a bottle of juiced up histimines. Poor people... can you imagine what their lives are like without the sweet sweet nectar of the gods... empty and clear headed I'd imagine. Something else you'll learn when you invite people over is that they can't eat shellfish. A lot of people are allergic to shellfish. Their throats close up and then their face swells up and the funny thing is when this happens they look like blowfish. What about those people who sneeze a lot? They'll just sneeze and sneeze and I feel sorry for them but it's very tiring to say "Bless you" fifty times in a row. I mean, after 10 or so, you try to change it up a little bit... you're like "Oh? Gesundheit." "Again!" "Oh that was a good one!" "Can't stop huh?" "Well I'm gonna take off."
frusterbated boi [
11:25 PM ] |